Daisy Margaret McDaid: The story so far

Wow... well, where to start? My daughter is now 4 days old and it's been a whirlwind 4 days full mostly with joy and love.

There are two distinct moments in the last 4 days that have made the reality hit home that I am now a mother.

The first was on the morning after she was born in our quiet hospital room before the rest of the world had barely begun to stir. Bedridden and barely able to sit up straight on my own, Hubby cocooned me with pillows all around and handed her to me, all burritoed up in a hospital blanket. I cradled her in my arms and looked down into her big blue eyes which looked up and locked with mine. She then made a small "eep" sound that was just sooo cute. I could barely believe she was mine but, unlike the unreality of the day before, it began to sink in that I was this beautiful creature's mother.

The second moment was on Sunday night. The previous two nights, when Daisy wasn't settling down by the early hours, Hubby wheeled her off to the nursery to give us both the opportunity to sleep. On neither night did I mind. The first night I was just too tired and drugged up to care and the second night I'd had a really rough day pain-wise and couldn't keep my eyes open to help take some of the load off of Hubby. But on Sunday night, when Hubby went to do the same thing, it literally felt as though there was a string attached between her heart and mine and, as Hubby wheeled her out of the room, tears sprang to my eyes. I was physically unable to get out of bed and follow and too tired to really protest, but I cried myself to sleep. I wasn't worried about someone else looking after her, I just wanted her in our room, near me. I had this horrible sense that I would be missing something important and that the cuddles the nurses would be having with her were somehow directly stolen from me.

As someone who is not typically emotional, I did of course recognize that my post-partum hormones were kicking in and therefore gave myself a rational talking to. But it was the first of many moments since then where I have literally felt the strongest emotional tugs of my life toward anyone or anything. It happened again as we exited the hospital on Monday afternoon and then last night when I just couldn't put her down because she smelled so good and her little tummy felt so good up against me.

So, to say I (and Hubby) are besotted with our little Daisy is a complete understatement.

From the moment she was pulled out of me at 1:55pm on Friday, eyes wide open, kicking and screaming, she has steadily pulled us further and further under her spell with her big blue eyes and little cooing sounds. Even despite the pain of the c-section (and my-oh-my has there been pain,) she has managed to make every day since more wonderful than the next. We are having an absolute blast with her, sleep deprivation and all.

And who can believe Baby McDaid is a GIRL!? All those months of being convinced that she was an Elliott and the doctor announces "It's a girl!" Hubby and I literally stared into one another's tearful eyes with incredulity, saying "It's a girl! It's a GIRL?!" It barely registered for a few seconds that I had a daughter. Then they held her up over the curtain, arms spread wide open and mouth just as wide, mid-scream and she looked HUGE. I remember saying "She's SO BIG!" She just didn't look newborn at all, she was so plump and lively.

So, surprises from the last few days:

• It's fun! Hubby and I have been really enjoying our time together and with her as a new family. For the most part, the tough times have elicited laughter in recognition of our sudden new role as parents. We frequently stop, stare at each other and say how much we love each other and her before bursting into tears - yes, even Hubby seems to have hormone rushes!!
• The day can literally disappear staring into her eyes. Between feeding, cuddling, eating, burping, changing diapers, and receiving visitors, there's barely a moment to spare. Pah on getting bored, I say.
• I don't mind breastfeeding - at least so far. I've been more patient that I could ever have imagined with the, sometimes frustrating, process of getting a "good latch". I even didn't mind two consultations with the hospital lactation consultants who proceeded to manhandle my breasts with a vigor they (the boobs) have never experienced before. Yes - surprise indeed - I didn't feel a need to smack them in the teeth. I even appreciated their help. Despite supplementing with formula in the first couple of days at every feeding, I perservered without frustration or tears and this morning my milk finally came in. (Whole other story for a whole other post there. In short, can I say "OH MY GOD!")
• Recovery from the c-section has been easier and harder than I anticipated. Harder because there really has been lots of pain and discomfort. Easier because it got better and I'm more mobile faster than I thought I would be. Every day I experience significant progress which makes each day easier in turn.

One of the many joys of motherhood has been watching Hubby with his daughter. It's just too cute to see him staring at her with adoration. Willingly changing diapers, genuinely excited about cute outfit changes, and prone to kissing us both when we're cuddled up together, having Daisy has only made me love him even more. All this without even mentioning how fantastic he has been in looking after me after the c-section. I'm so lucky and so enjoying our time together right now; I wish it could last longer than the short week he has with us.

Well, it's taken me all day to write this post (between Daisy activities) and, shock horror, it's time for feeding 6 of the day. Daisy is giving poor Hubby a hard time and my boobs are on fire, so I'll write more tomorrow from the wonderful world of parenthood.

Who knew I would be so into this? ;o)