Getting to know you, getting to know all about you... 4 weeks

Daisy is 4 weeks old today, which means I have been a mother for about a month, which is just crazy - I mean me, a mother! Jeez Louise!

On the other hand, I'm definitely seeing that practice makes perfect with this whole motherhood thing. In the past week I have definitely felt less like I'm in visceral, survival mode. I wouldn't say I've "cracked it", that we're in a "routine", or that I'm getting any better at it, but more that I'm getting more familiar with what our little Daisy needs and what to expect from her in a 24 hour period. Not having every hour be a new surprise definitely helps with one's sanity and helps build mummy and daddy's confidence. Now when I'm up with her at 2am in the morning and we're about 90 minutes into trying to get her to sleep, at least I know the approximate pattern of what stages I'm going to have to go through before she conks out and can pretty much gouge what time I'll be hitting the sack based upon that. Equally, I know when things aren't going well, all hope is lost, and I need to call for reinforcements.

So, what do we know about our little Daisy?

1) She spits up a lot, which is just plain insulting when I spent the last 2-3 hours cooking up some sweet tasting milk for her. Having it almost immediately regurgitated down my cleavage (and yes, I have CLEAVAGE!) or all over my freshly washed top is heart breaking - I mean, it's not like I can just turn on a faucet for some more. Plus, I only have so many nursing tops and they're already shrinking from being washed so much!

Last night (or should I say at some ungodly hour of the morning) she projectile vomited all over Hubby, herself, and the armchair during his baby shift, eliciting the "I'm done with you!" response from her Daddy. (Note: this response has been used by both of us many times in the last 4 weeks.) As usual, I took over and she was out in 15 minutes. Same thing happens when I've spent 2 frustrating hours with her - hand her to someone else and she calls you a liar. Fussy baby? What fussy baby? Grrrrr. When this happens, I call her "My Little Minx."

Her penchant for the post-feeding spit-up has led me to play "name the stain" on my clothing. Yesterday morning I realized that my PJs were a sweet-smeeling cornicopia of spit-up, leaked breast-milk, spilled coffee, and pee (that had run down her back and onto her onesie during a diaper change and that we only found out about after I'd started breast feeding her.) As if the gory reality of post-c-section care wasn't enough to make my husband turn to some "strange" vs. ever having sex with me again! I mean, it's amazing that people ever have more than one kid! It really says something for the power of a man's sex drive that he can put all this stuff aside and do the hanky panky with her again.

2) Our morning greeting is directly related to her night-time shenanigans. If she sleeps 3-4 hours in a stint, goes back down within 60-90 minutes inbetween and gives us both a fairly decent night's sleep (which does happen 3 days out of the week on average) then Daisy is greeted by her parents thus: "Good morning my little girl! How are you this morning? Did you sleep good? Thank you for letting mommy and daddy sleep last night..." etc... etc... and lots more goo goo gaa gaa'ing. However, when she behaves like the Little Minx, it sounds more like this: "Waaa waaa waaa. Tell it to someone who gives a shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Whatever." Seriously, both of us seem to have a similar script and it's funny to hear the other on the baby monitor first thing in the morning.

3) This kid is the peeing and pooping Queen of babydom. Ok, so I really have nothing to measure this against since this is my first experience of 24/7 newborn care but I can't believe how much this kid relieves herself! No wonder she's always hungry - it goes in one end and right out the other. It's not uncommon to change her diaper and have her poop/pee in the middle of the changing (we call this the "two diaper change") only to walk down the stairs and feel/hear her making another deposit into the third diaper. Then, not 15 minutes later, you'll be feeding her and you'll hear her go through the motions again. If her poops were dollar bills, her college tuition would be paid-up by now. This is not even to mention the sheer volume of the "deed." You just wouldn't imagine that a newborn baby pooping could be heard clear across the room - in fact, as I write this, Ms. Daisy just did a major squirt whilst in her Nanny's arms on the other side of the room and I think I probably could have heard it in the back yard. I kid you not.

4) She likes to sleep on her side. Which is not to say that we are putting her in her crib on her side, only to say that this is how she gets to sleep. During the day, however, we do lay her down in her sleep positioner on the couch on her side and she luuurves it. The whole side-laying thing was further borne-out by a DVD we bought and that came highly recommended on a number of websites, "The Happiest Baby on The Block." If you've never heard of it and you have a newborn, I highly recommend it. Screw all that baby whisperer crap and all those books that leave you feeling like an inadequate mother, this one 30 minute DVD demystified the process of calming an infant without any of that patronizing, anxiety-inducing stuff that just drives me nuts. It's all about the "5 Ss": Side-lying, Sucking, Shhhing, Swinging, and Swaddling. Turns out, between Hubby, me, and Nanny, we were already doing all of the above just not all at once. When you put the 5 together, you really can instantly soothe a cranky newborn. It's pretty freakin' amazing, easy, and great to have at your fingertips when you're at the end of your tether.

5) Like her mother, she likes to be out and about. Feed her, change her, throw her in her car seat and head out and you've got a recipe for a sleepy, happy baby. This past week we've gone shopping and/or out to lunch almost every day and she's been an absolute darling. Admittedly she has a max 3 hour time window but I'll take that for sure; getting out of the house is critical to mummy's mental health.

6) She's a Nanny's girl. Undoubtedly. She turns to mush when Nanny's got her in her arms. Which leads me to bouts of extreme panic when I think about the fact that my Mum leaves on Sunday for 3 months. In fact, I'm not going to write any more about it because it will ruin my day.

This past week I also got to get out and about a bit without Daisy, equally as important to my mental health. On Saturday night we left her with Mum and Dad and went to Scott's Seafood (just a stone's-throw away) for appetizers and my favorite, Ultimate Lemon Drop Martini. It was bliss. We felt so liberated that we got in the car afterward and went to Kohls for a shopping spree. We were only gone for a total of 2.5 hours but it was 2.5 hours of just being "Hubby and Wifey" again vs. "Mummy and Daddy." Then, last night, Mum and I went out for Happy Hour with my friend, Mala. Again, I partook in a Lemon Drop Martini and Mum got tipsy on two Shark Bite cocktails. Anyone who has seen my Mum tipsy knows that this provided much entertainment for the evening! Today Mum and I are leaving her with my Dad for a couple of hours while we head out for a manicure and pedicure. Yes, I am definitely making the most of having Mum around while she's still here. Gulp... ok, off that topic again.

So, at 4 weeks we seem to be in a better place mentally. It's still hard work and she still has the power to bring us down with one crazy night but overall it's feeling less like we landed on an alien planet and more as though we're beginning to integrate our new role into our old lives somewhat. We're definitely changed and nothing will ever be the same again but at least some semblance of ourselves and our regular, pre-baby lives, is emerging.

Here are some week 4 photos. Thanks for keeping in touch with Daisy...