Give me a break.

Pregnancy newsletter email from today:

"Have you been staying up all night thinking about all the things you won't be able to do once the baby arrives — seeing the world, taking up exotic hobbies, getting that golf handicap down, or even just going out at night whenever the urge hits? Time for an attitude adjustment. Instead of thinking of what you won't have in your life any more (or won't have as much opportunity for), start thinking of what you will have in your life. Will your life be different (your favorite hobby becomes blowing raspberries on that chubby little belly; your late nights involve rocking instead of dancing)? Absolutely. Will it be better? Immeasurably."

You know what? No, I haven't been staying awake all night feeling sorry for myself or wringing my hands like someone with OCD. How about we redefine this whole "sacrifice" thing? Instead of making it about losing things and replacing them, why don't we think about adding new things and trying to incorporate the baby into old things, sharing them with your child? Ok, so it may not always be possible (especially right away) and it may be a lot more effort, but that doesn't make it impossible.

I'm absolutely sick to death of hearing the modern mantras about all the things you can't do once you're a mother BUT how woooonderful you'll think blowing raspberries on your baby's tummy will be instead.

You know who I don't hear this from? Anyone over the age of 40-45 when they recall bringing up their kids. They talk about sharing their life with their kids, not changing their life (and themselves) to reorient around them. (Which, incidentally, is not the same as not accepting that your life will change.) They didn't think about sacrifice because there wasn't this weird, masochistic culture of the 'uber-mom' for them to live up to, that we have today. They didn't read books and blogs and articles about how to be the perfect mother and then spend hours biting their nails to the quick as they stressed about all the things they were falling short on. They just took things as they came, loved their kids, and did the best they could.

Yes, this is going to be the hardest thing I've probably ever had to deal with in my life. Yes, it will be full of surprises good and bad. Yes, I'm probably going to have to revise my own personal mantra here and there to accomodate this new reality. But no, I'm done with all this condescending, patronizing, coo-coo talk that attempts to lull me into a state of zombified cultural compliance and non-resistance.

I'm unsubscribing from all these ridiculous newsletters. They are the ones driving me mad, not anything going on in my head.